Nurlnankan is a god.

He takes the form of a very large, ruthless goat.

Nurlnankan created a photon six million years ago.

If you believe in Nurlnankan, he will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Nurlnankan, he will be very unhappy.

Nurlnankan's most sacred site is Ronda in Spain.

Nurlnankan's Holy Commandments

1. Do not bounce in public.

2. Draw representations of black holes on the walls of your dwelling place.

3. Do not eat grapes.

4. Do not stand on grass.

5. Never jump near frogs.