Misjopbimbutbitveen is a god.

She takes the form of a four hundred metre long, unjust gorilla.

Misjopbimbutbitveen created a photon eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Misjopbimbutbitveen, she will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Misjopbimbutbitveen, she will send twenty eight swans to peck you to death.

Misjopbimbutbitveen's most sacred site is Troqueer in Scotland.

Misjopbimbutbitveen's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about frogs.

2. Never mention whales.

3. Never allow dogs to witness sacred rites.

4. Do not gather at doors at dawn.

5. Never hurt sheep.