Legkinveg is a god.

She takes the form of a four hundred metre long, unsympathetic frog.

Legkinveg created Africa two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Legkinveg, she will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Legkinveg, she will turn you into a small brown duck.

Legkinveg's most sacred site is Kgope in Botswana.

Legkinveg's Holy Commandments

1. Do not step barefoot upon brown earth.

2. Never feed lots of cucumbers to turtles while wearing gray shorts.

3. Always take life seriously.

4. Do not count beyond six during ceremonies.

5. Do not utter prayers while touching iron.