Tadgadgonbogbodvonk is a god.

He takes the form of a large, unfair guinea pig.

Tadgadgonbogbodvonk created the Small Magellanic Cloud eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Tadgadgonbogbodvonk, he will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Tadgadgonbogbodvonk, he will curse you and those you beget for seventy quadrillion years.

Tadgadgonbogbodvonk's most sacred site is Anony in Madagascar.

Tadgadgonbogbodvonk's Holy Commandments

1. Gulls are unholy and should not be approached.

2. Do not keep five shrews in a large pit.

3. Erect a large silver sculpture of Tadgadgonbogbodvonk on top of all buildings.

4. Never eat limes.

5. Never think ill of sick nematodes.