Zedlistgon is a god.

He takes the form of a rotund, intelligent manatee.

Zedlistgon created Mount Everest two million years ago.

If you believe in Zedlistgon, he will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Zedlistgon, he will have a low opinion of you.

Zedlistgon's most sacred site is Embalam in India.

Zedlistgon's Holy Commandments

1. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Never eat cucumbers.

3. Do not make images of living things.

4. Do not stand on grass.

5. Do not chop down trees.