Zakpigsog is a god.

She takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, intelligent lizard.

Zakpigsog created the planet Earth two billion years ago.

If you believe in Zakpigsog, she will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Zakpigsog, she will attempt to scare you with hail.

Zakpigsog's most sacred site is Bogogobo in Botswana.

Zakpigsog's Holy Commandments

1. Always take life seriously.

2. Never look at dwarf planets.

3. Eagles are not to be trusted.

4. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

5. Always pray in complete darkness.