Sawmonken is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely thin, unfair owl.

Sawmonken created the planet Earth three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Sawmonken, he will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Sawmonken, he will remove you from existence.

Sawmonken's most sacred site is Nakke in Denmark.

Sawmonken's Holy Commandments

1. Do not kill great tits.

2. Never think about chromosomes.

3. Always look after injured doves.

4. Never hop in the presence of shrews.

5. Never write about bacteria.