Jambog is a god.

It takes the form of a very fat, proud coyote.

Jambog created the planet Mars nine million years ago.

If you believe in Jambog, it will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Jambog, it will attempt to scare you with strong winds.

Jambog's most sacred site is Pialeia in Greece.

Jambog's Holy Commandments

1. Retreat if eight goats approach from the east.

2. Never sprint near snakes.

3. Jambog loves squirrels, so they must be respected.

4. Never talk about manatees.

5. Do not speak about carrots.