Ratsanddit Pakpibbug is a god.

She takes the form of an exceedingly large, omniscient guinea pig.

Ratsanddit Pakpibbug created the Large Magellanic Cloud five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Ratsanddit Pakpibbug, she will approve.

If you do not believe in Ratsanddit Pakpibbug, she will destroy your home solar system.

Ratsanddit Pakpibbug's most sacred site is Iskmo in Finland.

Ratsanddit Pakpibbug's Holy Commandments

1. Always treat moths with great respect.

2. Never talk about manatees.

3. Never write about moons.

4. Run away if six tortoises approach from the south.

5. Do not trade with those who eat coconuts.