Cimcadjarn is a god.

She takes the form of a large, dishonest otter.

Cimcadjarn created a Higgs boson three billion years ago.

If you believe in Cimcadjarn, she will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Cimcadjarn, she will turn you into a slug.

Cimcadjarn's most sacred site is Fangchuan in China.

Cimcadjarn's Holy Commandments

1. Mites are unholy and should not be approached.

2. Do not dye your hair fawn.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

4. Do not listen to music.

5. Never write about the weak nuclear force.