Vangarstan Cenmapgil is a god.

It takes the form of a very thin, unjust goblin.

Vangarstan Cenmapgil created the solar system six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Vangarstan Cenmapgil, it will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Vangarstan Cenmapgil, it will turn you into a slug.

Vangarstan Cenmapgil's most sacred site is Daraina in Madagascar.

Vangarstan Cenmapgil's Holy Commandments

1. Pigs are unholy and should not be approached.

2. Never paint your feet purple.

3. Pray towards the west.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of titanium.

5. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.