Fedarncumcadsittablun is a god.

It takes the form of a six hundred metre long, emotional spider.

Fedarncumcadsittablun created tapeworms seven thousand years ago.

If you believe in Fedarncumcadsittablun, it will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Fedarncumcadsittablun, it will send four elderly elephants to rub you out.

Fedarncumcadsittablun's most sacred site is Karikalampakkam in India.

Fedarncumcadsittablun's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about fire.

2. Fedarncumcadsittablun must be the most important thing in your life.

3. Do not chop down trees.

4. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

5. You must never eat coconuts.