Fasdagpod Gessfunjam is a god.

She takes the form of a six thousand metre long, unsympathetic warg.

Fasdagpod Gessfunjam created the Black Eye Galaxy five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Fasdagpod Gessfunjam, she will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Fasdagpod Gessfunjam, she will refuse to believe in you.

Fasdagpod Gessfunjam's most sacred site is Taktser in China.

Fasdagpod Gessfunjam's Holy Commandments

1. Do not covet oxen.

2. Erect a large silver sculpture of Fasdagpod Gessfunjam on top of all buildings.

3. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Do not kill gulls.

5. Never paint your head black.