Tampangtarg is a god.

She takes the form of a chunky, flying slug.

Tampangtarg created snails eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Tampangtarg, she will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Tampangtarg, she will hide angry, venomous snakes in your dwelling place.

Tampangtarg's most sacred site is Letino in Italy.

Tampangtarg's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about gravity.

2. Erect a giant green sculpture of Tampangtarg in the centre of the settlement.

3. Your children must be taught to worship Tampangtarg.

4. Do not hurt ants.

5. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.