Vogwadgep is a god.

It takes the form of a corpulent, unthoughtful donkey.

Vogwadgep created a quark two million years ago.

If you believe in Vogwadgep, it will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Vogwadgep, it will turn you into an amoeba.

Vogwadgep's most sacred site is Khwee in Botswana.

Vogwadgep's Holy Commandments

1. Do not keep four nematodes in a large pit.

2. Fast once a month.

3. Show mercy to disobedient children.

4. Always help great tits in need.

5. Never think ill of sick doves.