Kopsandtag is a god.

She takes the form of a seven hundred metre long, unsympathetic faun.

Kopsandtag created the planet Mars six billion years ago.

If you believe in Kopsandtag, she will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Kopsandtag, she will send minions to preach to you.

Kopsandtag's most sacred site is Hondarribia in Spain.

Kopsandtag's Holy Commandments

1. Always treat seals with great respect.

2. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

3. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

4. Run away if seven eagles approach from the north.

5. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.