Arnfemfag is a god.

She takes the form of a huge, contented octopus.

Arnfemfag created dark matter three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Arnfemfag, she will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Arnfemfag, she will refuse to believe in you.

Arnfemfag's most sacred site is Yerakini in Greece.

Arnfemfag's Holy Commandments

1. Always obey Arnfemfag's priests.

2. Nematodes are not to be trusted.

3. Never bounce near turtles.

4. Erect six silver sculptures of Arnfemfag on top of important buildings.

5. Always make sure there are no frogs in a room before entering it.