Vinbatpod is a god.

She takes the form of a four hundred metre long, contented guinea pig.

Vinbatpod created life nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Vinbatpod, she will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Vinbatpod, she will attempt to scare you with hail.

Vinbatpod's most sacred site is Laurila in Finland.

Vinbatpod's Holy Commandments

1. Vinbatpod loves badgers, so they must be respected.

2. Pray towards the north.

3. Do not drink water in fawn rooms.

4. Always make sure there are no sheep in a building before entering it.

5. Your children must be taught to worship Vinbatpod.