Mithigarm is a god.

He takes the form of a rotund, boastful turtle.

Mithigarm created matter two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Mithigarm, he will not care.

If you do not believe in Mithigarm, he will torture you forever.

Mithigarm's most sacred site is Saint Cado in France.

Mithigarm's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about fluid mechanics near snakes while wearing red stockings and balancing seven iron spheres on your neck.

2. Do not speak about limes.

3. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Mithigarm.

4. Do not wear gray clothing.

5. Never eat bark.