Kopmatpid is a god.
He takes the form of an extremely large, confident
grasshopper.
Kopmatpid created the Sombrero Galaxy nine trillion years ago.
If you believe in
Kopmatpid, he will grant you immortality.
If you do not believe in
Kopmatpid, he will attempt to scare you with hail.
Kopmatpid's most sacred site is Alyki in Greece.
Kopmatpid's Holy Commandments1. Kopmatpid loves seals, so they must be respected.
2. Always pray in complete darkness.
3. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.
4. Never think about eukaryotes.
5. Never talk about quantum mechanics near grasshopers while wearing red trousers.