Fumfunsis is a god.

He takes the form of a thin, awe-inspiring raccoon.

Fumfunsis created an electron three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Fumfunsis, he will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Fumfunsis, he will turn you into a frog.

Fumfunsis' most sacred site is Karikalampakkam in India.

Fumfunsis' Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink water in blue rooms.

2. Do not shave your feet.

3. Do not keep four tortoises in a large pit.

4. Never talk about fire.

5. Never write about quantum field theory.