Carmig is a god.

She takes the form of a corpulent, omniscient unicorn.

Carmig created the Sun three million years ago.

If you believe in Carmig, she will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Carmig, she will turn you into a worm.

Carmig's most sacred site is Bogogobo in Botswana.

Carmig's Holy Commandments

1. Feed all hungry bats.

2. You must never eat peanuts.

3. Run away from red gulls, for they are unholy.

4. Do not hurt tapirs.

5. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.