Dossbodkip is a god.

She takes the form of a planet-sized, stupid finch.

Dossbodkip created the Sombrero Galaxy nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Dossbodkip, she will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Dossbodkip, she will turn you into a plant.

Dossbodkip's most sacred site is Goldcliff in Wales.

Dossbodkip's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed lots of onions to manatees while wearing red skirts.

2. Do not keep four otters in a large pit.

3. Never hop near monkeys.

4. Do not drink water in pink rooms.

5. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.