Sogfenwap is a god.

It takes the form of a huge, narcissistic fairy.

Sogfenwap created the planet Saturn nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Sogfenwap, it will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Sogfenwap, it will turn you into a puffin.

Sogfenwap's most sacred site is Thimmanaickenpalayam in India.

Sogfenwap's Holy Commandments

1. Do not wear magenta clothing.

2. Ants are unholy and should not be approached.

3. Never wear mauve kilts.

4. Paint representations of stars on the walls of your dwelling place in fawn.

5. Do not wear copper on your body.