Gabmifflab is a god.

She takes the form of a corpulent, unthoughtful swan.

Gabmifflab created life seven thousand years ago.

If you believe in Gabmifflab, she will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Gabmifflab, she will have a very low opinion of you.

Gabmifflab's most sacred site is Hej in Sweden.

Gabmifflab's Holy Commandments

1. Always make sure there are no rats in a room before entering it.

2. Never feed lots of bread to snakes while wearing magenta stockings.

3. Erect a giant titanium sculpture of Gabmifflab in the centre of the settlement.

4. Your children must be taught to worship Gabmifflab.

5. Show mercy to disobedient children.