Sakbafwod Quatdabvonk is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely fat, impressive ferret.

Sakbafwod Quatdabvonk created a bottom quark seven thousand years ago.

If you believe in Sakbafwod Quatdabvonk, it will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Sakbafwod Quatdabvonk, it will curse you and those you beget for twenty six billion years.

Sakbafwod Quatdabvonk's most sacred site is Ulsted in Denmark.

Sakbafwod Quatdabvonk's Holy Commandments

1. Never bounce in the presence of porpoises.

2. Do not shave your back.

3. Never sing near sheep.

4. Show mercy to disobedient children.

5. Never paint your face blue.