Pigwodsas is a god.

He takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, witless swallow.

Pigwodsas created dark matter three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Pigwodsas, he will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Pigwodsas, he will send three marmosets to sort you out.

Pigwodsas' most sacred site is Nanjie in China.

Pigwodsas' Holy Commandments

1. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

2. Never eat green fruit.

3. Erect six aluminium sculptures of Pigwodsas on top of important buildings.

4. Do not dye your hair white.

5. Never think about the strong nuclear force near horses while wearing blue tights and balancing three tin spheres on your legs.