Nigcetrigkankabfagnel is a god.

It takes the form of a galaxy-sized, selfish sheep.

Nigcetrigkankabfagnel created the solar system eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Nigcetrigkankabfagnel, it will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Nigcetrigkankabfagnel, it will curse you and those you beget for fifty two trillion years.

Nigcetrigkankabfagnel's most sacred site is Pialeia in Greece.

Nigcetrigkankabfagnel's Holy Commandments

1. Never think ill of sick seals.

2. Never paint your back yellow.

3. Voles are unholy and should not be approached.

4. Never mention aardvarks.

5. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.