Voncubsinjadcut is a god.

It takes the form of a planet-sized, temperamental jaguar.

Voncubsinjadcut created bats twelve years ago.

If you believe in Voncubsinjadcut, it will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Voncubsinjadcut, it will turn you into a mouse.

Voncubsinjadcut's most sacred site is Wukan in China.

Voncubsinjadcut's Holy Commandments

1. Never hurt voles.

2. Never eat green fruit.

3. Show mercy to disobedient children.

4. Fast once a month.

5. Always look both ways before crossing roads.