Bumbogcuss is a god.

He takes the form of a fat, calm swan.

Bumbogcuss created oxygen eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Bumbogcuss, he will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Bumbogcuss, he will refuse to believe in you.

Bumbogcuss' most sacred site is Fangchuan in China.

Bumbogcuss' Holy Commandments

1. Erect a large carbon sculpture of Bumbogcuss on top of all buildings.

2. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Do not drink water in white rooms.

4. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Bumbogcuss.

5. Never feed onions to rats while wearing pink shirts.