Arnlunlen is a god.

It takes the form of a chunky, unsympathetic skunk.

Arnlunlen created a bottom quark three million years ago.

If you believe in Arnlunlen, it will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Arnlunlen, it will not care.

Arnlunlen's most sacred site is Littoinen in Finland.

Arnlunlen's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink water in turquoise rooms.

2. Never feed lots of carrots to bats while wearing white coats.

3. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

5. You must never eat garlic.