Fubstanflap is a god.

She takes the form of a very fat, all-powerful pig.

Fubstanflap created Mount Everest four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Fubstanflap, she will approve.

If you do not believe in Fubstanflap, she will destroy your home galaxy.

Fubstanflap's most sacred site is Ylike in Finland.

Fubstanflap's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

2. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

3. Never talk about whales.

4. Walk at least six thousand metres per day.

5. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.