Bellartjanyarl is a god.

He takes the form of a minute, sapient deer.

Bellartjanyarl created tapeworms three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Bellartjanyarl, he will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Bellartjanyarl, he will try to impress you with rainbows.

Bellartjanyarl's most sacred site is Pandamatenga in Botswana.

Bellartjanyarl's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed corn to eagles while wearing yellow trousers.

2. Mice are not to be trusted.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of gold.

4. Never skip near ants.

5. Do not kill ducks.