Komtailyak is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely large, selfish squid.

Komtailyak created parasitic wasps eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Komtailyak, she will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Komtailyak, she will attempt to scare you with strong winds.

Komtailyak's most sacred site is Aguaruto in Mexico.

Komtailyak's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about eukaryotes.

2. Look mercifully on unfortunate snakes.

3. Do not speak about parsnips.

4. Do not listen to music.

5. Never think about ultrasonics near voles while wearing purple jumpers and balancing eight lead spheres on your neck.