Ponripmip is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely small, generous armadillo.

Ponripmip created a photon nine million years ago.

If you believe in Ponripmip, it will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Ponripmip, it will turn you into a hamster.

Ponripmip's most sacred site is Grimme in Germany.

Ponripmip's Holy Commandments

1. Worship no other gods but Ponripmip.

2. Never mention snakes.

3. Never pour water over plants.

4. Never talk about fire.

5. Aardvarks are not to be trusted.