Toncenbin is a god.

She takes the form of a fat, duplicitous troll.

Toncenbin created an atom six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Toncenbin, she will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Toncenbin, she will turn you into a rat.

Toncenbin's most sacred site is Bokaa in Botswana.

Toncenbin's Holy Commandments

1. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

2. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

3. Always stare at clouds.

4. Do not commit murder.

5. Feed all hungry great tits.