Loopcatfoss is a god.

She takes the form of a chunky, omniscient rat.

Loopcatfoss created Africa eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Loopcatfoss, she will be happy.

If you do not believe in Loopcatfoss, she will attempt to scare you with thunder.

Loopcatfoss' most sacred site is Finnmark in Norway.

Loopcatfoss' Holy Commandments

1. Run away if five gulls approach from the west.

2. Do not take Loopcatfoss' name in vain.

3. Do not make images of living things.

4. Feed all hungry cats.

5. Never feed lots of cherries to mites while wearing indigo tights.