Fotfutsad is a god.

She takes the form of a five thousand metre long, ruthless whale.

Fotfutsad created dark energy nine million years ago.

If you believe in Fotfutsad, she will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Fotfutsad, she will hide angry queen hornets in your dwelling place.

Fotfutsad's most sacred site is Kardous in Egypt.

Fotfutsad's Holy Commandments

1. Do not speak about turnips.

2. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Fotfutsad.

3. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

4. Do not wear pink clothing.

5. Show mercy to disobedient children.