Sassterfosscar Targvilsaw is a god.

He takes the form of a very long, compassionate lizard.

Sassterfosscar Targvilsaw created a Higgs boson two years ago.

If you believe in Sassterfosscar Targvilsaw, he will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Sassterfosscar Targvilsaw, he will destroy your favourite star.

Sassterfosscar Targvilsaw's most sacred site is Manna in Greece.

Sassterfosscar Targvilsaw's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear jumpers.

2. Never think about comets.

3. Do not fashion models of living things.

4. Pray towards the west.

5. Never write about the inheritance of acquired characteristics.