Donpommut is a god.

She takes the form of a plump, irritating centipede.

Donpommut created the planet Earth two years ago.

If you believe in Donpommut, she will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Donpommut, she will hide angry, venomous snakes in your dwelling place.

Donpommut's most sacred site is Monong in Botswana.

Donpommut's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat bark.

2. Always stare at clouds.

3. Respect your elders.

4. Learn nine new languages a year.

5. Fast once a month.