Fotfedsand is a god.

He takes the form of a six hundred metre long, omniscient guinea pig.

Fotfedsand created a Higgs boson three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Fotfedsand, he will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Fotfedsand, he will manifest in front of you.

Fotfedsand's most sacred site is Cuandixia in China.

Fotfedsand's Holy Commandments

1. Do not covet oxen.

2. Never play with disobedient children.

3. Erect a giant blue sculpture of Fotfedsand in the centre of the settlement.

4. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Do not eat carrots.