Kimfligjam Gupnurtrutt is a god.

It takes the form of a four thousand metre long, witty bee.

Kimfligjam Gupnurtrutt created humankind six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Kimfligjam Gupnurtrutt, it will not care.

If you do not believe in Kimfligjam Gupnurtrutt, it will name a particularly small and pointless dust cloud after you.

Kimfligjam Gupnurtrutt's most sacred site is Fangchuan in China.

Kimfligjam Gupnurtrutt's Holy Commandments

1. Never chant in the presence of ants.

2. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Look mercifully on unfortunate snails.

4. Never wear black rings.

5. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.