Bumsandstaf is a god.

It takes the form of a very long, tranquil wombat.

Bumsandstaf created matter four years ago.

If you believe in Bumsandstaf, it will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Bumsandstaf, it will attempt to scare you with strong winds.

Bumsandstaf's most sacred site is Randers in Denmark.

Bumsandstaf's Holy Commandments

1. Do not chop down trees.

2. Do not keep three dolphins in a large pit.

3. Never talk about quantum mechanics near grasshopers while wearing yellow jumpers and balancing eight silver spheres on your feet.

4. Feed all hungry nematodes.

5. Do not shave your face.
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