Farcubtig Nutcaryar is a god.

She takes the form of a two thousand metre long, competent grasshopper.

Farcubtig Nutcaryar created dark matter three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Farcubtig Nutcaryar, she will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Farcubtig Nutcaryar, she will destroy your home solar system.

Farcubtig Nutcaryar's most sacred site is Daren in Wales.

Farcubtig Nutcaryar's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear skirts.

2. Never talk about fire.

3. Do not fashion models of living things.

4. Do not shave your legs.

5. Do not dye your hair indigo.