Bafdonjap is a god.

It takes the form of a galaxy-sized, all-powerful goblin.

Bafdonjap created the solar system four billion years ago.

If you believe in Bafdonjap, it will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Bafdonjap, it will curse you and those you beget for fifty two trillion years.

Bafdonjap's most sacred site is Turckheim in France.

Bafdonjap's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

2. Always make sure there are no birds in a room before entering it.

3. Do not stand on grass.

4. Do not laugh in public.

5. Always wear red.