Boggatgofkem is a god.

She takes the form of a chunky, amazing lion.

Boggatgofkem created a Higgs boson nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Boggatgofkem, she will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Boggatgofkem, she will curse you and those you beget for twenty six billion years.

Boggatgofkem's most sacred site is Saint-Sauvan in France.

Boggatgofkem's Holy Commandments

1. Erect five platinum sculptures of Boggatgofkem on top of important buildings.

2. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

3. Hide if three sharks approach from the north.

4. Never eat green fruit.

5. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Boggatgofkem.