Tabdumkab is a god.

It takes the form of a minute, awe-inspiring squirrel.

Tabdumkab created energy two years ago.

If you believe in Tabdumkab, it will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Tabdumkab, it will remove you from existence.

Tabdumkab's most sacred site is Mmankgodi in Botswana.

Tabdumkab's Holy Commandments

1. Always make sure there are no moths in a room before entering it.

2. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Tabdumkab.

3. Always stare at clouds.

4. Never think about fluid mechanics near goats while wearing orange shirts and balancing four titanium spheres on your back.

5. Do not wear iron on your body.