Taltipham is a god.

She takes the form of a five thousand metre long, humane dolphin.

Taltipham created the universe five million years ago.

If you believe in Taltipham, she will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Taltipham, she will curse you and those you beget for fifty two trillion years.

Taltipham's most sacred site is Bertkow in Germany.

Taltipham's Holy Commandments

1. Fast once a month.

2. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

3. Never talk about dwarf planets.

4. Never mention manatees.

5. Never wear indigo tights.