Gepsigdid is a god.

It takes the form of a very fat, selfish cat.

Gepsigdid created Africa three billion years ago.

If you believe in Gepsigdid, it will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Gepsigdid, it will send you a sign.

Gepsigdid's most sacred site is Mazunte in Mexico.

Gepsigdid's Holy Commandments

1. Always help sick snakes.

2. Always wear black.

3. Always stare at clouds.

4. You must love Gepsigdid.

5. Never eat green fruit.