Bissartrill is a god.

He takes the form of a small, egotistical lobster.

Bissartrill created silver five million years ago.

If you believe in Bissartrill, he will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Bissartrill, he will cry a lot.

Bissartrill's most sacred site is Yongding in China.

Bissartrill's Holy Commandments

1. Pray towards the south.

2. Do not make images of living things.

3. Do not keep eight great tits in a large pit.

4. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

5. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Bissartrill.