Fetdibomt is a god.

He takes the form of a five thousand metre long, witless goblin.

Fetdibomt created a top quark five million years ago.

If you believe in Fetdibomt, he will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Fetdibomt, he will send you a strongly worded letter.

Fetdibomt's most sacred site is Dimson in England.

Fetdibomt's Holy Commandments

1. Do not stand on grass.

2. Do not eat corn.

3. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Fetdibomt.

5. Always obey Fetdibomt's priests.