Dibquatcuss is a god.

It takes the form of a gargantuan, contented hydra.

Dibquatcuss created viruses five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Dibquatcuss, it will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Dibquatcuss, it will hide angry, venomous snakes in your dwelling place.

Dibquatcuss' most sacred site is Ringford in Scotland.

Dibquatcuss' Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

2. Never mention grasshopers.

3. Erect four silicon sculptures of Dibquatcuss on top of important buildings.

4. Always take life seriously.

5. Do not dye your hair black.