Gumgig is a god.

He takes the form of a three hundred metre long, vain octopus.

Gumgig created everything that exists four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Gumgig, he will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Gumgig, he will refuse to believe in you.

Gumgig's most sacred site is Polagam in India.

Gumgig's Holy Commandments

1. Look mercifully on unfortunate doves.

2. Do not chop down trees.

3. Erect a giant mauve sculpture of Gumgig in the centre of the settlement.

4. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of platinum.